28 Jun Locus Loser
I made the trek to Seattle, but Signal to Noise did not win a Locus Award. However, my second time in Seattle was much better than the first, when I got food poisoning. Hurray for improvements and the availability of chocolate cake at the parties.
While in Seattle I chatted a bit with Nick Mamatas, Keffy of the Glittership podcast, and Gary K. Wolfe, among other people. Nick Mamatas took the most unflattering picture of me at the Locus Awards lunch. In retaliation, I took this picture of him. The dress code was Hawaiian shirts, so I wore a crown of red flowers. I even signed some books, which is always a bit of a shock. Who are you who buys my book?
Did I tell you one time I was thrilled that the two copies of my novel were purchased at a nearby Chapters? For three whole days I thought I was a real writer. Then my mother told me she’d bought them. I am sure my mother secretly buys copies around Vancouver to keep me from having a nervous breakdown.
I am working on another novel, though regularly depressed, so who knows what will happen. Writing and publishing are a dance with disenchantment. You are reminded of your inadequacy and stew in a violent soup of dissatisfaction and envy. At least, I do. Money never arrives on time. People make snippy comments about you, your hair (yes) or your book cover. And so, there are days when I want to say fuck it. Fuck it, I need to work on my French, I need to do more exercise, anyway, so why not focus on that?
The novel I’m working on is called Lords of Xibalba. It’s about Mayan gods in 1920s Mexico. Enterprising editors should just offer me a fuckload of money to finish it.